Shrek's Adventure

Shrek’s Adventure is one of those attractions that sounds fun, big DreamWorks branding, characters everyone knows, colourful posters everywhere - and then you get inside and think, “Oh… right… this is what I paid for?”

You shuffle through a series of small rooms where actors try their best (fair play to them) to drag you through a storyline that feels like a school pantomime with a bigger budget. There are “quests,” “missions,” and “magic moments,” but none of it hides the fact that it’s basically a long queue disguised as an experience.

And yes, no filming allowed. Not because it’s some secret magical wonderland, but because if you filmed it, nobody would pay £££ for it ever again. Honestly, calling the price tag ambitious is generous. It feels like someone took a 20-minute kids’ show, stretched it to an hour, slapped DreamWorks on the front and hoped parents wouldn’t notice.

Kids under 7 might enjoy the costumes and loud noises. Everyone else walks out thinking, “Wow… that’s money I’ll never see again."